apparently i am systematically working at pissing every one of my friends off. it's been a while since i've had a breakdown like this. but something as simple as being slightly annoyed by a friend who was badgering me with the same question got me so fed up i pretty much took it public and said [this is the abbriged version mind you] "fuck no i'm not showing, even tho i said i would. why? because you irratated me. nothing else really. now pardon me while i work on further alienating myself.".
let's just say it didn't go over too well.