shock me / make me feel better...

i hosed the mailserver today.

even after i was told not to restart sendmail last night, i did at 11 this morning - completely forgetting that i was told not to. we've been pounding our heads into the wall trying to get it fixed. and we're still pounding our heads into the wall... 9 hours later. maybe i should go home, take a whole assload of something and wake up monday. i'm so not looking forward to this weekend. and my horoscope said it'd be a 9 out of 10 day... fuck that stupid astrologer bitch.

i feel like a stupid little kid. i feel like beating myself up for my mistake. i feel like crawling into a bottle and not coming back out. i feel miserable.